Hank Williams Jr. has finally shared his unequivocal opinion on Garth Brooks. Williams, a recognized country legend, has maintained silence on the matter until now.
“I wouldn’t be caught dead on stage with him nowadays,” declared Williams Jr. “Every time he steps out, the crowd boos. He had to cancel his Vegas residency over it.”
Guinness World Records reports that Brooks now holds the record for the most ex-fans who are willing to pay to see him just to express their disapproval. Milli Vanilli previously held this dubious honor. For Brooks, this marks yet another setback in his declining career.
“He’s probably going to call it quits and move on,” commented spokesman Joe Barron. “He’s amassed something like eleventy billion dollars.”
Hank Jr. is the latest addition to a growing list of country artists who have joined the movement against Garth Brooks. “He brought it on himself,” remarked Jerry, a neighbor of Alan Jackson. “If it weren’t for that stupid restraining order, I’d go over and tell Alan to say it himself.”
Jerry, a patriotic American who loves his country, holds a strong dislike for Garth Brooks. “He wouldn’t denounce Bud Light,” he said with a tear in his eye. “And now, I can never listen to Achy Breaky Heart again.”
Billy Ray Cyrus was too occupied to respond, allegedly preoccupied with a past acquaintance from middle school. However, his spokesman, Joe Barron, conveyed Cyrus’s gratitude for being mentioned in print at all. God Bless America.
